Home Is Where The _____ Is (Part Three)

When you think of home, what immediately comes to your mind?

A house. Cozy bed. Favorite nook. Mother's cooking. Playing outside. Family. Friends. Small town. Constantly moving city. Memories. Things. People. Safety. Security. Love. Acceptance. Roots.

When I think of home, I immediately visualize my parents, spouse and closest friends. Then I think about the millions of sisters and brothers across the world who love the Creator. No matter how hard I try not to attach home to a place, I do think about the town my parents live in at the moment where I spent my teen years. Then I think about my brothers and family who live 13 hours away where I spent my childhood. Then each place I've been, be it for 2 weeks or 2 years, has had a certain element of home that has left an imprint on me.

It's okay to experience homesickness. Like I said in Part Two, homesickness is grieving, and that's okay. But what's not okay is when homesickness turns into an identity crisis.

What happens when I put my identity into where I am from, how I was raised or what I look like?
I am American. "Uh-marr-eh-kuh!"  So to the third-world, they assume all Americans are Christians who smoke, drink alcohol, and are promiscuous. Well, that's what TV says so it must be true.
I'm a redhead, so I must be feisty, have a fiery temper and hail from Ireland.

I've started to stereotype myself because I've accidentally wrapped my identity with my past. And though roots are part of what make us.. us, it's no longer a strong root when you move into a different pasture. So what keeps us grounded?

If I say I am this, then I exclude that. "I am a redhead, so I can't be South Asian." This makes it even more difficult when I'm needing to learn and accept parts of the new culture. It's pitting me against them. I'm not accepting change, my perspective gets more narrow and my heart deceivingly becomes prideful. I get infuriated by the many differences. I lose sight of the similarities and the positive things I should appreciate in the new culture.

I've already determined my reaction according to my unmet expectations. "I want to live in South Asia and not be seen as an American!" But, little miss redhead, you can't be fully South Asian because you're not. And you'll never be the same as when you left America.

You learn to compromise with yourself, balancing the lifestyle you knew and the one you should adapt to instill sanity and a new kind of normalcy. There is a way to be a little bit of everything. You can wake up on a mattress in a bed frame but then take a 5 minute shower before the water heater runs out. You can go to the market and do your best to speak the little language you know to buy fresh produce but then go back to your house, make dinner and watch a movie as if you were in your home country. You learn to have grace for yourself and remind yourself to show grace towards your new country.

So, I am human, 
I am loved by God (Romans 5:8)
I have been rescued from Satan's rule (Col 1:13),
I am adopted as God's child (Eph 1:5), 
I have been bought with a price - I am not my own - I belong to God (1 Cor 6:19-20),
I have been made complete in Christ (Col 2:10),
I have the right to come boldly before the throne of God to find mercy and grace in time of need (Heb 4:16),
I am an alien and stranger to this world in which I temporarily live (1 Peter 2:11),
and I am a citizen of heaven (Phil 3:20).

My home is in heaven. My heart is shared among many loved ones. My identity is in Christ. Home is where He is working and it's when I'm walking with Him. It's knowing that I have an eternal home in Heaven. For me, home is where the Father is.

If home is where the heart is, where is your heart residing?

Be rooted and grounded in love (Eph 3:14-19).

For more on the woman's heart and identity, refer to Developing A Discerning Heart.